Thursday, June 10, 2010

Depp - The Disasters

Apparently it was Johnny Depp's birthday the other day....(yes, since I'm mentioning it now, its just further proof on how out of the loop I am.) I know that some of you love him, but I think he's weird. Not like 'I eat bugs' weird, but more like 'I talk with 4 different accents in one conversation weird.'

Anyways, I don't think that I've ever been a big fan of his. I thought that it was just a little too far know the whole boy with scissors for hands thing. And then there was 'What's Eating Gilbert Grape'.....but lets be honest...I was too busy starring at Leonardo DiCaprio to even care about Johnny Depp...(quick side note, that was back when Leo was hot....and I do think that was the general consensus back then, so don't be giving me the side-eye about liking chunky guys.)

But truthfully, the movie where he completely lost me was the shiteous remake of 'Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.' The original is quite easily in my top 5 favorite movies of all time (don't judge... I'm pretty sure that you probably like some ridiculously gay movie as well.) Anyways, he destroyed the remake. What in the name of pervy movie character hell did he think he was doing? Really, he turned an eccentric chocolatier (played by Gene Wilder) into a creepy pervy candy peddler. (And No....for all of you die hard Depp fanatics, I refuse to take that back.) And the haircut on Willy Wonka....what the eff was going on there?

I finally saw 'Alice in Wonderland' with basically the same general conclusion. The Mad Hatter is a bizarre character at best, but what was with all of the accents? (...yes, he had more than one) and the huge eyes? It looked like they superimposed Puss in Boots' eyes from Shrek.

Don't get me wrong....I mean, he was a good Jack Sparrow in 'The Pirates of the Carribean' and he was good in 'Blow' too. Its not that I don't enjoy the movies he's in, he just gives me the heebies. Especially if he's teamed up with Tim Burton, but I won't even get started on Tim Burton .....


  1. What about Edward Scissorhands? That was ace. I agree about Charlie and the Chocolate Factory though, one of the worst films ever.

  2. yeah he made a creepy Wonka, made you kind of glad to not be one of the 5 "lucky" kids

  3. Avoided Depp and the chocolate factory, why remake something when the original is so good? I never understand that. I kind of like the Depp / Burton thing but I'm weird :0)

  4. Wow, you're all missing the depth of Depp! I think the Burton/Depp combo is the best thing going in Hollywood! Depp flat out commands the screen with these wonderful characters he's developed. Willy Wonka was amazing. I found Alice a bit slow, but the Mad Hatter was another tour-de-force for Depp (Helena Bonham Carter was amzing as well.) I like the fact that he defies the typical Hollywood star stereotype and takes the chances he does. I say, Go Depp!

  5. Hum....I love Tim Burton movies. I guess I am just a dork, though.

    I have to agree with you about Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, though. Gene Wilder is just the man and that movie is awesome!